I was you once. Two and a half long years ago. I am a mere shadow of myself now, but there is still life and light within that is starting to shine once again.
When you finally receive the diagnosis of Lyme Disease, it may feel like a huge burden has been lifted from your shoulders. You’ve been in pain and struggling for so long with no answers. Now that you have one, you may think life will get easier, and it may for awhile now that your condition has a name. You feel vindicated. You can now tell people you have Lyme, and are not in fact going crazy.
But slowly the sad reality sinks in. You are not getting better despite the diagnosis. You are not being cured despite the medicine you are given. You are walking on quicksand, and feel like no one is ever going to be able to pull you out.
Days go by, and you struggle to find the reason why you are not getting better. You decide to become an expert on Lyme Disease, but your brain fog and memory loss makes that task almost impossible.
So you take what you are given, try to eat better and look for the light at the end of the tunnel. But, all you can see is darkness.
The spirochetes are invading your body like an alien being on an old episode of Star Trek. If only Scotty could beam you up and out of this place, if only Dr. McCoy could find all the answers.
But, there are no concrete answers, there is no cure. Welcome to the Lyme Zone. A dimension where bright sights and loud sounds can drive you insane. Where finding a doctor who can actually reduce your suffering is like finding a needle in a haystack.
Your family and friends become distant as you are always sick and unable to participate in life’s pleasures. Your relationship with your spouse and kids becomes strained. They miss the old you, you wonder if she will ever come back.
I know what you are going through. I am so sorry for all of your pain. I wish I could take it all away.
I am here to tell you though that it is a long, horrible road, you will feel better. You may not be cured, but you will feel better. Try to find a good doctor or LLMD, and do what they suggest. Keep track of how you are feeling and when something makes you feel even the slightest bit better, let them know, it may set you on the right track. Don’t be afraid to try new medicines/treatments, but listen to what your body is telling you.
You will have a million ups and downs, but NEVER give up. Take each tiny victory as a sign that you are on the right path. Though it is long and hard it is totally worth it.
As hard as it is to concentrate and enjoy things, find something that you can tolerate to pass the time. Take up quilting, learn to play an instrument, volunteer, learn a new computer program, play solitaire, start journaling or blogging. I have always written poetry, and now have some Facebook pages, and blogs to pass the time and release my emotions.
Do what makes you happy when you can, and look forward to the next time you are able to do it. Have something to look forward to, even if it is only once a week. Get out of bed and make yourself look fabulous, whenever you have the energy to.
Watch and follow positive stories and role models. People who provide the light and perform good deeds can help us find the good in life once again. They can help us get through the years of torment that Lyme Disease puts us through. They can help lead the way to a brighter day.
I promise you it will come.
Think it. Believe it. Feel it within every inch of your soul.
And it will happen.
You are my hero.
You will get through this.
You are worth it.
I believe in you, so please start believing in yourself.
I’m on your side.
I’m right here fighting beside you.
You are not alone.
You can do this.
Now let’s get started.
Let’s kick some Lyme ass!
Nuts About My Son