My Game of Thrones Playlist to Get Me Through the Tough Days

I have just been through a year that had me shouting “seven hells” many times. My seven hells this year were PMDD, multiple pulmonary embolisms, anxiety, panic attacks, menopause, lyme disease and interstitial cystitis.

Game of Thrones, and other shows like it have helped keep me occupied and distracted through the pain and heartache that often accompanies chronic illness. I wrote an article about it last year. 

I am incredibly grateful to have made it through this year. I am still struggling and fighting, but am much better than last year. Tonight is the premiere of Game of Thrones and I can’t wait to watch it. Partly because I have been waiting a year and a half for the new season, and partly because it is a reminder that I made it through, I survived.

This morning while making pancakes for my family, it seemed like every song was reminding me of Game of Thrones. Some songs made me laugh, some made me think of certain GOT characters, and others made me feel excited and happy. So happy that I danced in my kitchen for the first time in over a year. I hope you enjoy my playlist, and I hope you dance too.

Here is my Game of Thrones playlist:

1. Another One Bites the Dust by Queen – who will bite the dust this season?
2. Every Rose Has Its Thorn by Poison – last season Margaery and Loris Tyrell were killed by Cersei. I’m sure that their grandmother Olenna will be all thorns this season.
3. Born to be Wild by Steppenwolf – The Wildlings are a huge part of GOT and will have a great role to play this season too as many battle will take place.
4. Back to Black by Amy Winehouse – Jon’s watch has ended and he won’t go back to black, but I’m sure the Night’s Watch will be by his side as they fight the Night King and his army of wights.
5. Pride by U2- this important song was of course written about MLK Jr., but it briefly made me think of the fictional character Ned Stark, who lived his life with honor and pride, and who many still fight for in the name of love.
6. The Rains of Castamere by The National- who could forget the Red Wedding or this amazing/haunting song. What will the Lannisters be up to this season? How many of us souls long to see/hear what they will do?
7. Burden In My Hand by Soundgarden – this song reminds me of Tyrion. He is now hand of the Queen, how will he handle this honor and burden? Will he rise to the occasion once they reach the sands of Dragonstone, or will he drown in alcohol and fall to pieces once again?
8. Dire Wolf by The Grateful Dead – Will Ghost return? Will Arya be reunited with Nymeria? Which sinners and bad guys will the Stark wolves attack? Many have it coming to them.
9. Hound Dog by Elvis Presley – He isn’t high class, but I’m so glad the Hound is back! He prefers chicken to rabbits and has been a secret friend of the Starks. F*ck the king, let’s see what he does this season!
10. Witchy Woman by The Eagles – Cersei was born with a silver spoon in her mouth, and now she has suffered the witches prophecy. Gold are now her children’s shrouds, will her little brother now choke her to death? We shall see.
11. Ain’t No Mountain High Enough by Marvin Gaye & Tammi Terrell – Nothing will stop The Mountain from protecting Cersei, not the Trident river or the Vale of Arryn, and nothing will stop me from watching the Cleganebowl if it happens this season!
12. Smoke On The Water by Deep Purple – this song reminds me of the Greyjoys since Pyke is always misty and smoky looking. It also reminds me of The Battle of Blackwater, and other battles to come. What will be Theon and Yara’s fate? What great battles on the sea lie ahead?
13. Something Wild by Lindsey Stirling – Dany has a big heart and has become wild and powerful, and she is being called home. While her dragons chase the sky, the lights are blinding and her quest is binding. Her maps and battle lines are drawn, will she prevail and ultimately sit on the throne?
14. Simple Man by Lynyrd Skynyrd – I’m on Team Stark and Jon Snow is my favorite. He may be a simple man but he has learned something, and does not live for rich mans gold. He follows his heart and knows what’s in his soul. I hope it leads him to great things and happiness.

This past year I said not today to the god of death many times. I hope you say not today too, and I hope he listens.

Winter is here. Let’s all hope it’s not a long one.

Kathy ❤

Poetologie

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Thank You to the Friends Who Met Me After Chronic Illness

To the friends who have met me after chronic illness,

You may have met me through my kids. You may have met me in the neighborhood. But that doesn’t matter, what matters is that you met me after I became chronically ill- but you still chose to become my friend.

You weren’t put off by my disheveled looks, my wrinkled clothes, my messy house, my tired eyes, my seldom seen smiles. You didn’t judge me, look at me strangely or differently, or walk away.

You gave me a chance because you are a special person. One who can see beyond appearances and chaos, and focus on what is important.

People. Helping others. Being a good person and friend.

You met me after Lyme Disease and Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder took over part of my brain and made me more anxious, confused and irritable. You met me after I was recovering from surgery and going through surgical menopause. You still supported me after I learned that I had multiple pulmonary embolisms, and didn’t know whether or not I would survive. You met me when I could barely take care of my children, let alone myself.

But, you still stuck around. You still gave me a chance. You still cared no matter what.

You didn’t stop coming around when I could not even make it to the door because I was too anxious to answer it. You didn’t stop calling or texting me to see if I needed anything, even though I could never return the favor. You didn’t stop asking me to do things even though you knew that I couldn’t for quite awhile.

You helped get my young son to school each and every day so that he wouldn’t miss out on anything. You made sure he was safe and well cared for. You made sure he had fun whenever he was with you and your children. You made sure my eleven year old daughter was also okay and had what she needed to get through the many crises we faced these past 2 years.

You never complained, you were just there. Right where I needed you, right when I needed you. You never asked for anything in return.

THAT is the definition of a true friend. Helping and caring for someone and being there without any expectations or desire for a reward or returned favor. That is the definition of you.

You are selfless. You are a wonderful person. You are just what I needed, but never thought I’d find again due to my maladies.

I am very lucky that I have a great husband who helps me with everything. But it is also nice to have some good friends. Friends like you. To laugh with, to spend time with, to grow with, to become better people with.

I had almost given up hope that I would find good friends in my new home state. After my many ailments, I thought it would be impossible.

But there you were, walking slowly but surely by my side. Maybe you saw a glimmer in my eye of what I once was- active, funny and spontaneous. Maybe you got brief hints of what my personality truly is, when free from the constraints of pain and sickness.

In a world where many people are focused upon material things and influential people, you choose not to be. You can see past all of that, and get right to the heart of the matter. You were able to see what was in my heart.

I can’t begin to tell you how much you mean to me, and to my family. I can’t begin to thank you enough for how you have helped me, and for how you have accepted me and all of my limitations.

Having you around has brought some newfound joy to my life. Having you around has helped me recover. Having you around has helped me smile again.

A lot of people in their forties have to deal with at least one chronic illness. They are lucky if they have good friends around to help them adjust and get through it. But, making new friends when you have more than one debilitating condition is very difficult. It can be a very lonely time. Online support groups can be very helpful, but nothing takes the place of a nearby friend. One who is there to listen, commiserate with and to give you a hug when you need it the most.

Thank you for being my friend. I know that it can be hard sometimes because of all I am dealing with, but hopefully better health and good times are just around the corner. I look forward to sharing those times with you.

And as I struggle to fall asleep tonight, I will have a smile on my face because I know that kind people like you exist in this world.

You are just what the doctor ordered.

Poetologie ❤